Aaiye GIRAH lagaiye-naya HAFTAWAR SILSILA

[shummu]

Re: Aaiye GIRAH lagaiye-naya HAFTAWAR SILSILA

wow nice thread

Thank U... hope u will participate in next competition..... :rose is competition ka aaj aakhri din hai :) agar abhi koi girah ho rahi ho to pesh kar dijiye....warna next time zaroor koshish kijiyega :D:

[shummu]

Re: Aaiye GIRAH lagaiye-naya HAFTAWAR SILSILA

Salam,
Agar ap kuch munfarid na karein tu ap ka nam Shummu Ji se badal kar kuch aur rakh deya jaey ga.:D:
Buhut umda silsila he.Mujhe Shakeel sahib ka Shair buhut passand aya.Meri totiphoti girah kuch yun he ke

Sadaein dete ho ab keyon tamam dunya ko
'kaha tha kisne ke ahd-e-vafaa karo unse'

lolz aapne to kuch zyaada hi taareef kar di ..thank u so much :salam:

yes shakeel jee ne zabardast girah lagayi hai..baaqi logon ne bhi bahut umda koshish ki hai aur mujhe khushi is baat ki huin ke aksariyat ne behr mein misra kaha hai including u :rose

Sadaein dete ho ab keyon tamam dunya ko
'kaha tha kisne ke ahd-e-vafaa karo unse'

wah...bahut khoob :thmbup:

[kashish]

Re: Aaiye GIRAH lagaiye-naya HAFTAWAR SILSILA

lolz aapne to kuch zyaada hi taareef kar di ..thank u so much :salam:

yes shakeel jee ne zabardast girah lagayi hai..baaqi logon ne bhi bahut umda koshish ki hai aur mujhe khushi is baat ki huin ke aksariyat ne behr mein misra kaha hai including u :rose

Sadaein dete ho ab keyon tamam dunya ko
'kaha tha kisne ke ahd-e-vafaa karo unse'

wah...bahut khoob :thmbup:

ws...aap ki doosri koshish bhi dkeh kar behad khushi hui magar is baar aap chook gayin zara sa...misra be behr reh gaya...

ye bataayein aap ke naam ka talaffuz kya hai..?

tah-rah(2-2)

ya

ta-hi-rah??(1 1 2)

khair filhaal mein 'taahrah' use kar rahi hun...

sehni paRengi zamaane ki sakhtiyaaN 'taahrah'
'kaha tha kisne ke ahd-e-vafaa karo unse'

ise is wazan mein laate hain...

ma faa i lun, fa i laa tun, ma faa i lun ,fa i lun (fe' lun)
1 2 1 2, 1 1 2 2 ,1 2 1 2 ,1 1 2 (2 2)


uThaani hongi zamaane ki sakhtiyaaN 'taahrah'(correct misra)
'kaha tha kisne ke ahd-e-vafaa karo unse'


ab is sher ko is ghazal ke tarz pe gunguna kar dekhiye :)

har aik baat pe kehte ho tum ke tuu kyaa hai
tumheeN kaho k ye andaaz-e-guftuggu kyaa hai

laga na ek hi tune mein hai?? :D:

Thanks aap ne meri galti ki nishandhi ki.
Mgr mere naam ka tlafuz
ta-hi-ra
hai
is tharh is ka wzan to
ta-hi-ra
1-1-2
howa.
Mere khyal se to wzan k brabr hai.
Ab aap btaein kya is trah wzan me nhi ho skta.

[shummu]

Re: Aaiye GIRAH lagaiye-naya HAFTAWAR SILSILA

jee aap ka naam dono tarah se wazan mein hai :)

wazan shuru ke alfaz ke gaRbaR hue....bas..yaani jo bold mein nahi...

sehni paRengi zamaane ki sakhtiyaaN 'tahirah'

ma faa i lun, fa i laa tun, ma faa i lun ,fa i lun (fe' lun)
1 2 1 2, 1 1 2 2 ,1 2 1 2 ,1 1 2 (2 2)

[kashish]

Re: Aaiye GIRAH lagaiye-naya HAFTAWAR SILSILA

seh ni paren gi
seh me gool he aati hai. wo agr lfaz k ander aaye to phir us ka wzan aik bhi ho skta hai or do bhi ho skta hai
ni me noon or choti ye aati hai. chotti ye jis me aaye us ka wzan bhi 1 ya do me se koi bhi ho skta hai.
pa is ka sirf aik lfz pe hai is trah is ka wzan aik howa
ren me arde,ye,noon guna hai. ye or noon guna ki mojodgi me wzan do hoskta hai. chahein to aik bhi rkh skte hain.
gi k mamle me bhi whi baat is gaaf or choti ye aati hai. is traha ye khtam kr k zeer lgane se is ka wzan aik ho skta hai or agr ye ko rehne diya jaye to phir wzan do likha jaskta hai.
istrah to misra behr me howa.
meri aik friend se detail le hai. wo shaeera hai. us ne to yhi btaya hai. or pegham pr jo notes diye gye hain shaeri k us me bhi ye points hain.

[ummid]

Re: Aaiye GIRAH lagaiye-naya HAFTAWAR SILSILA

xellent going... waah waah waah... specially shakeel bhai.. aap ka shair zabrdast... MashAllah... :rose

[Z.]

Re: Aaiye GIRAH lagaiye-naya HAFTAWAR SILSILA

nice khayal!!!magar wazan mein nahi hai....

ise behr mein laate hain:

1 2 1 2, 1 1 2 2 ,1 2 1 2 ,1 1 2 (2 2)
kyoN phir-te reh-te ho dee-waa-ne kii ta-rah ab tum

kyoN phirte rehte ho deewaane kii tarah ab tum?!


:rose

shukran shummu....in cheezoN ki mujhey bilkul nahi samaj ati ....infact mey ney koshish ki thi Zmufti sis key lessons sey kuch seekhney ki magar her cheez sar key uper sey guzar jati hai :D

but will try to learn inshAllah

thanks again :rose

[shummu]

Re: Aaiye GIRAH lagaiye-naya HAFTAWAR SILSILA

seh ni paren gi
seh me gool he aati hai. wo agr lfaz k ander aaye to phir us ka wzan aik bhi ho skta hai or do bhi ho skta hai
ni me noon or choti ye aati hai. chotti ye jis me aaye us ka wzan bhi 1 ya do me se koi bhi ho skta hai.
pa is ka sirf aik lfz pe hai is trah is ka wzan aik howa
ren me arde,ye,noon guna hai. ye or noon guna ki mojodgi me wzan do hoskta hai. chahein to aik bhi rkh skte hain.
gi k mamle me bhi whi baat is gaaf or choti ye aati hai. is traha ye khtam kr k zeer lgane se is ka wzan aik ho skta hai or agr ye ko rehne diya jaye to phir wzan do likha jaskta hai.
istrah to misra behr me howa.
meri aik friend se detail le hai. wo shaeera hai. us ne to yhi btaya hai. or pegham pr jo notes diye gye hain shaeri k us me bhi ye points hain.

woh to theek hai magar aap khud apne misre ko gungunaa kar dkehein..kya aap ko pehla lafz atakta mehsoos nahi ho raha??? aur jahan tak mujhe ilm hai 'sehni' ka wazan 'seh-ni' hai yaani 2-1(2) yaani 'sehni' mein 'h' pronounce hoga....

waise is sher mein:

har aik baat pe kehte ho tum ke tuu kyaa hai
tumheeN kaho k ye andaaz-e-guftuggu kyaa hai

tum-heeN ko TU-MEEN pronounce kiya gaya hai ..'h' ko neglect kiya gaya hai isliye iska wazan 1-2 sahi baith raha hai... magar sehni lafz ke baare mein confusion hai... chaliye main zarqa sis se confirm kar ke batati hun..ho sakta hai main bhi ghalat ho....:)

achcha laga ke aap ne apni baat rakhi... main zarqa sis se poochti hun...is bahaane mere ilm mein bhi izaafa ho jaayega... thanx :rose

[shummu]

Re: Aaiye GIRAH lagaiye-naya HAFTAWAR SILSILA

xellent going... waah waah waah... specially shakeel bhai.. aap ka shair zabrdast... MashAllah... :rose

aap bhi next time participate kijiyega sis :rose

[shummu]

Re: Aaiye GIRAH lagaiye-naya HAFTAWAR SILSILA

shukran shummu....in cheezoN ki mujhey bilkul nahi samaj ati ....infact mey ney koshish ki thi Zmufti sis key lessons sey kuch seekhney ki magar her cheez sar key uper sey guzar jati hai :D

but will try to learn inshAllah

thanks again :rose

sis koshish karti rahiye aur in competition wali threads mein aati rahiye aur behr ke baare mein articles parhti rahiye to inshallah zaroor samajh aane lagegi iski bhi...:phool: mujhe khushi hui ke aapne try to kiya kam se kam ...aayenda bhi hissa leti rahiyega :thmbup:

[shummu]

Re: Aaiye GIRAH lagaiye-naya HAFTAWAR SILSILA

woh to theek hai magar aap khud apne misre ko gungunaa kar dkehein..kya aap ko pehla lafz atakta mehsoos nahi ho raha??? aur jahan tak mujhe ilm hai 'sehni' ka wazan 'seh-ni' hai yaani 2-1(2) yaani 'sehni' mein 'h' pronounce hoga....

waise is sher mein:

har aik baat pe kehte ho tum ke tuu kyaa hai
tumheeN kaho k ye andaaz-e-guftuggu kyaa hai

tum-heeN ko TU-MEEN pronounce kiya gaya hai ..'h' ko neglect kiya gaya hai isliye iska wazan 1-2 sahi baith raha hai... magar sehni lafz ke baare mein confusion hai... chaliye main zarqa sis se confirm kar ke batati hun..ho sakta hai main bhi ghalat ho....:)

achcha laga ke aap ne apni baat rakhi... main zarqa sis se poochti hun...is bahaane mere ilm mein bhi izaafa ho jaayega... thanx :rose

Salam kashish!

zarqa sis ka to abhi jawab nahi aaya hai..woh jald jawab dengi magar filhaal maine net ki mehfilon ke bahut hi mashhoor-o-maaroof buzurg saahib-e-ilm sahib-e-kitaab shayar MOHTARAM SARWAR RAZ SAHAB(aap bhi unko jaanti hongi yaqeenan) KI RAAYE jaani to unka jawab ye aaya hai..aap khud paRh leiN..

---------------------------------------------------------
baqaul 'Sarwar Raz' sahab ke:


sehni paRengi zamaane ki sakhtiyaaN 'taahirah'
'kaha tha kisne ke ahd-e-vafaa karo unse'

(1) :sehnee: meN :hey: ke saakin hone kaa koyee jawaaz naheeN hai. :hey: pooree t^araH adaa ho gee aur is ko kisee Soorat se giraayaa naheeN jaa saktaa hai.

(2) pehlaa miSra' wazn se Khaarij hai aur naa-mauzooN hai. chaahe aap :hey: giraaYeN (jo Ghalat^ hai) yaa nah giraaYeN yeh kisee beHr meN naheeN hai. is kee iSlaaH kee Z^aroorat hai.


sarwar sahab ne saath mein aapke misre ki islaah bhi kar di hai mere kehne par:

ye raha misra

uThaa,o Taahirah ab saKhtiyaaN zamaane kee
kahaa thaa kis ne keh e'hd-e-wafaa karo un se


----------------------------------------------------------------------
ummmeed hai ab aap meri baat se sehmat hongi :)

[zmufti]

Re: Aaiye GIRAH lagaiye-naya HAFTAWAR SILSILA

Shummu jii
sab se pehle is silsile ki kaamyaabi per mubarikbaad qabool kijye
aap ne buhat mehnat ki hai is ke maiN aap ki b had mamnoon huuN

is silsle meN aik choti si tip share karna chahti huuN
jaisa ke is thread per aane waale jaan chuke hoN ge keh paband shayeri ke liye aap ko bahr ki pabandi kii pabandi karni hoti hai

دیا گیا مصرع تھا
کہا تھا کس نے کہ عہدِ وفا کرو اُن سے
اس کے افاعیل ہیں
مُفاعِلُن ۔۔۔۔۔ فَعَلا تُن ۔۔۔۔۔۔ مُفاعِلُن ۔۔۔۔۔۔۔۔ فَعَلُن
اب بحر کے ارکان پر حرکات دیکھئے
ہمیں ایسے ہی الفاظ اپنے مصرعے میں استعمال کرنے ہوں گے جن پر اسی ترتیب سے حرکات ہوں
اس کے لئے آپ کسی ایسی اُردو ڈکشنری سے مدد لے سکتے ہیں جس میں الفاظ کے تلفظ کو حرکاتیعنی زیر ، زبر، پیش سے واضح کیا گیا ہو۔
اس ضمن میں ایک اور بات یہ ہے کہ ہم لفظ کے آخر میں آنے والی 'ی'، 'ے'، 'ا' اور 'ہ' کو گرا سکتے ہیں یعنی تقطیع میں شامل نہیں کرتے مگر الفاظ کے درمیان ان کو گرایا نہیں جا سکتا
صرف 'نون غنہ' اور 'ھ' کو لفظوں کے درمیان گرا سکتے ہیں
کشش یا طاہرہ جی
سہنی کا وزن فعلن ہے جبکہ ہمیں یہاں مفا درکار ہے
اس جگہ ایسے الفاظ آسکتے ہیں

کہا ، سُنا ، بتا، بجھا، اُسے مجھے، کہاں وہاں، ، مرے ترے مرا ترا، صنم ،وفا جفا
اگر آپ غور کریں گی تو ان سب الفاظ کے پہلے دو حروف پر حرکت ہے جبکہ تیسرا ساکن ہے

خوش رہیئے
والسلام
زرقا

[shummu]

Re: Aaiye GIRAH lagaiye-naya HAFTAWAR SILSILA

Salam bahut shukriya ZARQA sis itni umdagi se samjhaane aur wazahat farmaane ke liye....aayenda bhi ummeed hai yuhiN aap apni giraaNqadr aara se nawaazti rahengi :)

[kashish]

Re: Aaiye GIRAH lagaiye-naya HAFTAWAR SILSILA

Aap sub ka boht boht shukriya. Itni tfseel se meri ghalti dor krne k liye. Thanks a lot

[Mujahid Khan]

Re: Aaiye GIRAH lagaiye-naya HAFTAWAR SILSILA

Thanks aap ne meri galti ki nishandhi ki.

Mgr mere naam ka tlafuz
ta-hi-ra
hai
is tharh is ka wzan to
ta-hi-ra
1-1-2
howa.
Mere khyal se to wzan k brabr hai.
Ab aap btaein kya is trah wzan me nhi ho skta.

assalamualaikum tahira ji,
aap k naam ka wazan jaisey k aap ne likha hai uss se bilkul wazeh hai,
ta-hi-ra
faa-i-lun
2 -1- 2
uthhani hogi situmgur ki tahira sakhti
kaha tha kis ne k ahd-e-vawaa karo unse