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Aey Chandni Tuu Chaand Kay Aagay Hisaar Khainch

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  • #16
    Re: Aey Chandni Tuu Chaand Kay Aagay Hisaar Khainch

    Originally posted by GumShuda View Post
    MashAllah , bohat hi umda shairi hai, aur andaz bi payara hai..
    thori bohti tarash kharash kartay raha karain..

    7th shair ko aisay parh kar daikhain..

    Phir Rang Ban kar Saray Ufaq Par Ubhroo'N Ga Mein...
    Mujh ko Meray Wajood se bas eik Baar Khainch...

    Yeh apki hosla shikni nahi hai mein ne tasalsal mein aisay hi parha lekin baad mein ghour se parha tu , Basoo'N parha , mera khayal hai basnay se Ubharna zayada wazan rakhta hai...

    Baqi apne bohat achi ghazal likhi hai... ab pata nai ap ne kia sooch kar likha hai tu phir waisay zayada strong ho kia pata ... mujh nacheez se bi ghalti ho sakti hai so please bura nai manye ga bhai .

    Khush rahain.
    Yar ghazal dawaN dol ho jaye gi :cc: BasoN acha hay
    Allah

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    • #17
      Re: Aey Chandni Tuu Chaand Kay Aagay Hisaar Khainch

      bohat aaala - wazan bohat khoob - radeef aur kaafia bhi be misaal - :) daad kabool kejye
      Allah

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      • #18
        Re: Aey Chandni Tuu Chaand Kay Aagay Hisaar Khainch

        Originally posted by Hashim Raza View Post
        salam alikum
        dosto aik aur ghazal aap ki bazm main paish hai
        umeed hai pasand aaey gi
        aik Mushkil radeef aur qafiyay k sath itna insaf kisi mahir hee ka kam ..
        hai ..Buhat khoob likha Hashim raza sahib ! :thmbup:

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        • #19
          Re: Aey Chandni Tuu Chaand Kay Aagay Hisaar Khainch

          Originally posted by Yaaram View Post
          Yar ghazal dawaN dol ho jaye gi :cc: BasoN acha hay
          ji yahi to main keh raha hon... agar "ubhron" use kar lia to yeh sher wazan say bhi ubhar jaey ga... yeh lafz "bason" say sher bhi bass gaya hai..
          khush rahin sada

          Comment

          • #20
            Re: Aey Chandni Tuu Chaand Kay Aagay Hisaar Khainch

            Originally posted by Yaaram View Post
            bohat aaala - wazan bohat khoob - radeef aur kaafia bhi be misaal - :) daad kabool kejye
            bohot shukriyya
            yaaram.. ap ki hosla afzai ka mamnoon hon
            khush rahin sada aap

            Comment

            • #21
              Re: Aey Chandni Tuu Chaand Kay Aagay Hisaar Khainch

              Originally posted by Gul View Post
              aik Mushkil radeef aur qafiyay k sath itna insaf kisi mahir hee ka kam ..

              hai ..Buhat khoob likha Hashim raza sahib ! :thmbup:
              gul sahab..
              bohot shukriyya
              ham mahir to nahin.. bas koshish kartay hain kay kuchh likh paain
              duaaon main yaad rakhiyeh ga
              khush rahin sada

              Comment

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