When you are sad,
I will get you drunk and help you plot revenge against the jerk who made you sad.
When you are scared,
I will laugh at you and tease you about it every chance I get.
When you are worried,
I will tell you how much worse it could be and to quit complaining.
When you are confused,
I will use little words to explain it to your dumb ass.
And when you are lost,
I will answer my cell phone and give you directions.
When you are sick,
I will hold your hair while you pay homage to the porcelain god.
When you fall,
I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass.
This is my oath, I pledge till the end.
Why you may ask?
Because you're my friend.
I will get you drunk and help you plot revenge against the jerk who made you sad.
When you are scared,
I will laugh at you and tease you about it every chance I get.
When you are worried,
I will tell you how much worse it could be and to quit complaining.
When you are confused,
I will use little words to explain it to your dumb ass.
And when you are lost,
I will answer my cell phone and give you directions.
When you are sick,
I will hold your hair while you pay homage to the porcelain god.
When you fall,
I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass.
This is my oath, I pledge till the end.
Why you may ask?
Because you're my friend.
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